the Beatniks Win VH-1’s Premier Episode of Cover Wars

VH1 is following many other channels and getting more heavily into reality TV. First, they had Rock & Roll Jeopardy, which, of course, featured host Jeff Probst, who ended up hosting Survivor as well (and even brought back some Survivor II contestants to play the game show). Then they brought in Bands on the Run to follow four bands as they hit the road and compete against one another.
Their newest game show is Cover Wars, hosted by Paul Shaffer and Sky Nellor (though, frankly, it seems the only reason Nellor is there is to wear skimpy clothing and look good). This show features three cover bands who compete to play mostly well-known songs in a variety of ways. The winner of each show moves on to the semi-finals, and then on up to the finals.
The first two rounds are rated by celebrity judges. Former Skid Row lead singer Sebastian Bach is one, USA Today music reviewer Elysa Gardner is another, and Royston Langdon is the third. Round one is called “Human Jukebox,” and involves each of the judges requesting a song for each band. The band has 30 seconds to play that song. After each judge has given them one to play, they rate them on a scale of ten. If they don’t know the song, well, as Shaffer says, that’s just too bad.
3Peace is the first band, and Bach gives them “Ramblin’ Man.” It is rather amusing seeing a guy with a mini-mohawk singing this song, but they do a good job. Gardner gives them Duran Duran’s “Hungry Like the Wolf,” which it’s obvious they don’t really know (luckily, they only have to fill half a minute). Langdon gives them “What I Got,” which they obviously know and do a good job playing. At the end of the round, Bach and Gardner rate them at 7, Langston at 10, for a total of 24.
Clueless is next, and they are given Styx’s “Mr. Roboto” by Gardner. The band knows the line, “Domo aragato, Mr. Roboto,” but that’s about it, so they repeat it for 30 seconds while one of the lead singers makes robotic moves. Langston gives them a Matchbox 20 song, which they do fine on. Bach gives them Queen’s “Another One Bites the Dust.” They have the right beat but mess up the lyrics. While I thought they were pretty mediocre, Gardner and Langston give them 9 each, and Bach gives them a 7, for a total of 25.
The third band, The Beatniks, are presented with “No Rain” by Blind Melon, and do a pretty good job of it. The drummer is quite obviously out of his mind, but in a good way. Bach gives them Kiss’s “Rock & Roll All Night,” and they do an excellent job with it. Gardner gives them “People Are Strange” by the Doors, and they do another great job. They are given 10 by Langston and Bach, and a 9 from Gardner, for a well-deserved score of 29.
The second round involves three songs that were picked at random and will get “musical facelifts.” The songs are announced and then one judge tells the band what style to do it in. After they do it once in that style, they are asked by the same judge to switch to a different style.
The Beatniks are given “Celebration” as the song, and Bach asks them to do it in lounge singer style. They do okay, but I sure wouldn’t have called that lounge style. Then they move on to Reggae as the second style. They are rated at 8 by Bach, 9 by Gardner, and 10 by Langston, for a total of 27.
Clueless is given “Sweet Dreams (Are Made of These)” and asked by Garnder to do it in country/western. They do quite a good job of it, and a similarly good job in the second style, heavy metal. Bach gives them two thumbs up and a score of 10, Gardner a 9, Langston a 9, for a total of 28.
3Peace is presented with “Take On Me” and told by Langston to do it in a Sexy Latin style. Eh. Then they are asked to do it in R&B. Frankly, I couldn’t really tell the difference. The judges weren’t impressed either, giving them only a total of 20.
So, the totals are at 56 for The Beatniks, 53 for Clueless, and 44 for 3Peace. At this point, it’s time for 3Peace to leave, because the final round is head-to-head for only the top two.
Here’s the way it works: They are given a list of ten songs. One band picks a song and starts to play it as the clock ticks down. When the buzzer sounds, they stop and the other band must pick up – musically and lyrically – exactly where the first stopped. If they do it correctly, they get a point and control of the board to pick the next song. If the don’t, the first team gets the point and picks again. The first group to three points wins the game.
The Beatniks start since they came in with the higher score. Their choices are:
- Black Water
- Jungle Boogie
- Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)
- Le Freak
- The Way You Love Me
- Lullaby
- What It’s Like
- Sitting on the Dock of the Bay
- Let’s Get It On
- South Side
The Beatniks choose to begin at the second chorus of “Sitting at the Dock of the Bay.” When they stop, Clueless picks up with the wrong lyrics and loses the round. The Beatniks pick “Black Water” as the second round and Clueless drops the ball with the lyrics again. For the third, The Beatniks go with “Let’s Get It On” and Clueless actually gets it right.
Clueless picks “Le Freak” as the next one, which is kind of a strange pick. I mean, it’s not like there are really any lyrics involved. So when they pass it over, it’s quite easy for The Beatniks to pick it up. They do so and get the point, giving them three and the game. So, The Beatniks – who really were the best ones there, in my opinion – will go on to the semi-finals.
Overall the game was pretty amusing – not a bad way to spend a small slice of TV viewing time. I imagine that, over time, it may start to get a bit boring. But for now, at least, I’ll put it on my TV calendar.
~ Article written by David Bloomberg

